The Great Big Guide to Financial Planning for Adoption and Surrogacy
Whether you are coming into adoption or surrogacy after already spending money on fertility treatments or not, looking at either path is a significant financial undertaking. While adoption is often cited as a heart forward way of family building, the fact is both of these paths take significant financial investment. These are real costs, and most families find out how much too late, and without a map. As you start your journey, you may be feeling overwhelmed, isolated, and like you're trying to navigate a world that wasn't designed with you in mind.
This guide exists to help you navigate.. It outlines the major categories of costs, funding strategies, grants, loans, tax benefits, and planning tools available to families pursuing adoption or surrogacy in the United States. It is a planning resource, not a financial guarantee. Costs are variable and change often. Where we've noted specific figures, we've cited current sources, but always verify directly with providers, because these numbers shift.
If you haven't met us before: we're Famally, a resource for non-birthing parents. We serve families who are growing through adoption, surrogacy, and foster care, and we believe that finding this path shouldn't mean going at alone, financially or otherwise. Throughout this guide, you'll also find expert insights from Janene Oleaga, a New York fertility attorney at Oleaga Law LLC, who provided perspective on the legal and financial realities families face in these journeys.
We know this is a lengthy post with a lot of information. We've pulled all of this into one organized, downloadable planning guide including a cost estimator by path type, a grant checklist, and a planning timeline you can use as you go. Enter your email to get it sent directly to you.
Part One: Why Does This Cost So Much?
Sticker shock is real so here’s the most direct answer we can give.
Adoption cost ranges (current estimates):
Private domestic adoption through a licensed agency typically runs $20,000–$45,000. Some agencies put the estimate closer to $60,000 or $80,000. Adoption
International adoption is estimated at $25,000–$50,000 depending on the country. TrustedCare
Foster care adoption is the least expensive path, with many families paying between $0–$2,500, often limited to court filing fees and finalization costs, most of which states will waive or reimburse. Justia
What may be included in adoption costs:
Agency or attorney program fees
Legal fees for both adoptive parents and, in some cases, birth parents
Home study ($1,000–$4,000, sometimes included in agency fees)
Social work services
Post-placement supervision
Birth family support (housing, medical, counseling — regulated by state law)
Travel costs, which can be significant in both private domestic and international adoption
Post-placement reports and supervision
Surrogacy cost ranges:
In the United States, a full gestational surrogacy journey typically costs intended parents $100,000–$200,000, depending on factors like medical care, insurance, legal services, surrogate compensation, and agency support. Circle Surrogacy
What drives surrogacy costs:
Surrogacy agency fees ranging from $20,000–$40,000.
If you pursue independent surrogacy or surrogacy without an agency, you may save those agency fees but then would do all the work of the agency on your own.
Surrogate compensation alone ranges from $60,000–$70,000+, including base pay and additional benefits and expenses related to her pregnancy. Circle Surrogacy
Medical/IVF costs (paid separately to your clinic and not included in agency fees)
Egg donation, if needed
Donor compensation, if needed
Screening tests
Legal fees for both intended parents and the surrogate
Insurance for the surrogate's pregnancy
Escrow and administrative fees
Part Two: Ways to Pay for an Adoption
When planning for the cost of your adoption, there is no one-size-fits-all approach. Most families use a combination of strategies. There is no right or wrong way to go about doing it. Whatever you decide should feel comfortable to you in risk and reward.
Personal Assets
Personal savings accounts
Reallocating existing assets (retirement accounts, 401(k), investments)
If you go this direction, be sure to consult a financial advisor before doing it. There may be tax implications and they may be significant.
Credit cards
May have a high interest rate but could help in an emergency
Home equity loan or HELOC
Usually have a lower interest rate but you are using your house as collateral
Gifts from family
Some families ask for adoption fund contributions in lieu of wedding or holiday gifts. For example, Famally founder Kelsey Bigelow says “We went without a honeymoon and asked for adoption fund money instead when we got married.”
Loans
National Adoption Foundation — Also offers unsecured loans in addition to grants (see below). Verify current loan terms directly with NAF — amounts and rates change.
LightStream, SoFi, Prosper — General personal loan lenders that can be used for adoption expenses. Online lenders typically charge 6.49%–25.29% APR depending on credit profile.
Pathways for Little Feet — A Christ-centered 501(c)(3) offering interest-free loans up to $10,000 at 0% interest to single parents, couples, and foster-to-adopt families. Funds are available one month before placement, with a 2–4 week decision timeline. Note: requires partnership with a licensed adoption agency and approved home study. Religious affiliation is part of their framework; review eligibility criteria.Pathwaysforlittlefeet
ABBA Fund — Provides interest-free loans, typically $6,000–$8,000, not to exceed one-third of overall adoption expenses. Usually a three-year term. Available to married Christian couples. Cradlehope
America's Christian Credit Union — Low-interest rate adoption loans for Christian families.
Adoption Grants
Grants are competitive and not guaranteed. Plan around them, not for them. Most require a completed home study to apply.
Gift of Adoption — Grants up to $15,000 for domestic, international, and relative/kinship adoptions, with no exclusions based on race, religion, age, marital status, gender, or sexual orientation. Average grant is approximately $4,000. Rolling applications. Adoption Grants
Help Us Adopt — Grants up to $20,000, awarded four times a year to families with significant financial barriers. Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption
National Adoption Foundation (NAF) — Offers financial aid to families with no exclusions based on race, ethnicity, gender, age, sexual orientation, or family characteristics. Open to all legal adoptions of non-related children. Grant amounts range from $500–$2,000. Board meets quarterly. FundyouradoptionWhfc
A Child Waits Foundation — Grants up to $10,000 for final adoption costs. Open to U.S. and Canadian citizens adopting domestically or through foster care. Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption
AdoptTogether — A crowdfunding platform that also has a grant program. Families can set up a profile to fundraise while also applying for grants through the Hoping Hearts Foundation.
Both Hands — Offers fundraising support; families organize a day of service for a widow, then raise funds from donors who sponsor the project. Unique model that builds community while raising money. Cradlehope
Show Hope — Adoption Aid grants generally range from $8,000–$12,000. Requires a completed home study, agreement with their Statement of Faith, and a pastor reference. Four application deadlines per year. Show Hope
Lifesong for Orphans — Matching grants and interest-free loans for Christian families. Also supports churches in creating their own grant and loan programs for adoptive families.
Important note on Christian-affiliated grants: Many of the largest adoption grant programs (Show Hope, ABBA Fund, Pathways for Little Feet, JSC Foundation) require agreement with a Christian Statement of Faith. If that doesn't apply to your family, Gift of Adoption, Help Us Adopt, and NAF are the primary inclusive options. Verify all eligibility requirements before investing time in an application.
Employer Benefits
Some employers offer benefits that can help in adoption funding or offsetting some part of the adoption process.
Be sure to check directly with your HR department. Don’t assume your company doesn’t offer benefits, even though only about 1 in 5 companies in the US currently do.
If your employer doesn’t currently adoption benefits, the National Adoption Center has advocacy resources that can help you make your case to HR.
Employer benefits can offset certain parts of the adoption journey and may only be eligible to be used in a certain time period or towards a certain part of the journey. Some aren’t eligible to be used until after you have already secured a placement so wouldn’t be able to be used towards a placement that falls through, etc. Most of these programs are created to help offset rather than fully replace out of pocket expenses.
Crowdfunding and Community Support
Platforms: GoFundMe, AdoptTogether (adoption-specific, with tax-deductible donations)
Church, civic, and community grants: Many local religious communities have informal or formal funds for adoptive families
In-person events: some families hold fundraising dinners, auctions, or other community events
“I have friends who hosted an event at a restaurant owned by their close friends on a night they are normally closed. They sold tickets to cover cost and leave them with money towards their family building, the restaurant provided a themed menu, there were options to sponsor specific items, and there were speakers between each course. It was incredible. They promoted the event on social media and asked for donations directly through Gofundme. They raised more money than they thought possible. It was so cool to be a part of watching something so small become such a game-changer for their family building financial planning.”
Part Three: Ways to Pay for a Surrogacy Journey
Many strategies overlap with adoption funding, but surrogacy has some specific financing tools because it can also overlap with IVF.
Personal Assets
Personal savings accounts
Reallocating retirement or investment accounts
If you go this direction, be sure to consult a financial advisor before doing it. There may be tax implications and they may be significant.
Home equity loan or HELOC
Specialty Financing for Surrogacy and Fertility
Sunfish — Offers low-interest fertility loans up to $100,000 for IVF, surrogacy, and egg freezing. Rates range from 6.99%–35.99% depending on borrower profile; loan terms from 2–7 years with no prepayment penalties.
CapexMD — Flexible loan terms for surrogacy expenses including medical and legal costs, with same-day review for applications submitted before 2 p.m.
Future Family — Tailored loan programs for fertility journeys, including concierge services to help manage payments alongside treatment milestones.
Prosper Healthcare Lending — General personal loans up to $50,000 for medical expenses including surrogacy
SoFi — Personal loans from $5,000–$100,000 that can cover surrogacy costs.
BetterMed — Offers up to $350,000 in loans with zero percent interest rates. Ask for a $10,500 application fee as security, which is taken off the total amount that you pay back.
Surrogacy Grants
Surrogacy specific grants are fewer than adoption grants and most are tied to a diagnosis of infertility or medical need.
Baby Quest Foundation — Grants ranging from $2,000–$16,000 (combination of medications and cash), awarded twice yearly. Open to all genders, singles, same-sex couples, and permanent U.S. residents. Requires a fertility specialist recommendation. For surrogacy specifically, you must have selected an agency or surrogate carrier before applying, and the grant must be issued prior to embryo transfer.
Tinina Q. Cade Foundation — Provides up to $10,000 per family for domestic adoption and infertility treatments including gestational surrogacy. Open regardless of race, religion, ethnicity, or sexual orientation. Grants are awarded twice yearly (spring and fall deadline). Note: grants are designated for the specific treatment you apply for and cannot be redirected to a different path.
Gift of Parenthood — Grants for assisted reproduction including surrogacy, awarded four times per year
Men Having Babies — Provides cash and in-kind grants to help alleviate the costs of IVF treatment, egg donor, and surrogacy costs for gay men. Also maintains a searchable employer benefits database.
The Surrogacy Foundation - Provides one full surrogate journey grant per year
Worth the Wait — Provides grants for legal fees, surrogate compensation, and related costs for young adult cancer survivors pursuing surrogacy or adoption.
Employer Benefits for Surrogacy
Surrogacy benefits have exploded in recent years. For example, American Express provides up to $35,000 for surrogacy and adoption and Meta offers up to $50,000 towards surrogacy.
Even if your company doesn’t explicitly offer reimbursement benefits, always ask your HR department if surrogacy or IVF benefits are offered.
Similarly to adoption, many reimbursement programs require that the contract is complete before they will pay anything. You should not rely on these benefits to fund the entirety of your journey. They should be a fun bonus rather than what you’re relying on.
Crowdfunding
Less common for surrogacy than adoption, but it happens. GoFundMe is the primary platform. Be thoughtful about how you frame your story and what you're comfortable sharing publicly.
“One of the biggest surprises for many families is how variable these costs can be depending on the circumstances. Building a contingency budget to best prepare is so important.”
Part Four: Unexpected Costs to Keep in Mind
Whether you're adopting or pursuing surrogacy, plan for costs beyond the headline numbers:
For adoption:
Legal fees can vary by complexity and jurisdiction — contested adoptions cost significantly more
ICPC (Interstate Compact on the Placement of Children) clearance is required when adopting across state lines. Most ICPC processes take 10–14 business days after paperwork is submitted, but wait times vary by state capacity and documentation completeness. During your wait, you’re staying in another state, paying all travel, lodging, meals, etc. You might also be off work for an unspecified amount of time so know if you can afford to do that.
Post-placement reports (required by most states and agencies before finalization)
Medical expenses for the child, especially if there are any health considerations at birth
Postpartum care expenses for the birth mother, which are legally regulated but vary
For surrogacy:
Failed embryo transfers and each additional transfer adds medical and medication costs, and potentially another round of agency/escrow fees
Variable expenses include additional embryo transfers, unexpected medical complications, travel for appointments, lost wages for the surrogate, and insurance changes or coverage gaps
Pre-birth orders of legal parentage vary by state and some require costly court proceedings
Post-birth orders if a pre-birth order wasn't obtainable in your state
Bed rest reimbursements for the surrogate if complications arise
For both:
Counseling and psychological evaluations
Court fees and administrative/filing fees
Travel and lodging
Part Five: The Financial Risks of These Journeys
“Family building journeys, whether adoption or surrogacy, carry financial risk. There is always the possibility of a disrupted match with a potential birth mother, a broken match with a potential gestational surrogate, unsuccessful embryo transfers or IVF cycles, changes in legal requirements across jurisdictions, and unexpected medical expenses or gaps in health insurance coverage. Legal guidance is critical. The right agreement terms and the correct insurance policies can allocate risk and provide clarity to everyone.”
The financial risks in family building through adoption or surrogacy are real. Some ways to mitigate them:
Work with experienced, licensed, and reputable professionals and verify licenses and references before working with someone.
Review all contracts carefully before signing. Have a reproductive attorney review any surrogacy or adoption agreement
Purchase insurance where applicable (surrogacy journey insurance exists; some agencies require it)
Build a contingency fund into your budget from the start.
Part Six: Tax Strategies
The Federal Adoption Tax Credit
This is one of the most significant pieces of financial assistance available to adoptive families, and it changed meaningfully in 2025. Similiarly to many financial options in adoption, it shouldn’t be relied on to cover the entirety of your journey.
The maximum credit for 2025 is $17,280 per child and starting in 2025, up to $5,000 of the adoption tax credit is now partially refundable. This means even if your federal tax liability is lower than the credit, you can receive up to $5,000 as a direct refund.
The credit begins to phase out at a modified adjusted gross income (MAGI) of $259,190 and is fully unavailable at $299,190. Internal Revenue Service
Qualified expenses include court fees, agency fees, attorney fees, dossier costs, travel and meals, and other required expenses. Birth mother expenses typically do not qualify.
If your child qualifies as a "special needs" adoption as defined by the IRS, you can claim the full credit even if you had no out-of-pocket expenses. Families Rising
Work with a tax professional who is familiar with adoption tax law. Organizations like Families Rising offer free educational resources on claiming the credit correctly.
Surrogacy and the Adoption Tax Credit
The adoption tax credit does not apply to surrogacy. Surrogacy is not an adoption under the tax code.
Employer Adoption Assistance Exclusion
If your employer provides adoption assistance benefits, you can exclude up to $17,280 from your taxable income in 2025. This is separate from the tax credit but you cannot use both the exclusion and the credit for the same expenses. A tax professional can help you optimize across both.
State Tax Credits
Currently 41 states have income tax, and many offer some type of adoption deduction or credit in addition to the federal credit. Search "[your state] adoption tax credit" or ask your tax preparer.
HSA/FSA Considerations
HSA and FSA funds generally cannot be used for adoption or surrogacy agency fees, legal fees, or surrogate compensation. They may cover certain medical expenses if properly documented. Verify with your provider. This one is easy to get wrong!
Part Seven: Building Your Financial Plan
If you have a financial planner, don't hide what you're planning. Family-building through adoption or surrogacy involves significant financial commitments that can span multiple years. Your advisor can only help you if they have the full picture.
Steps to build your plan:
1. Get clear on your current actual numbers. Do you need to “clean up” anything financially such as high interest debt?
2. Map a realistic timeline. Timelines vary significantly by path:
Foster-to-adopt: months to years depending on case
Private domestic infant adoption: often 1–3 years from starting the process to placement
International adoption: highly variable, 2–5+ years depending on country
Surrogacy: typically 18–24 months from matching to birth
Your timeline affects how long you have to save, when loans would be needed, and when you'd receive a tax credit.
3. Layer your funding sources in sequence. A working order:
Start with employer benefits research (if applicable) — know before you start what's reimbursable
Grants take 1–6+ months to process; apply as early as you're eligible
Loans provide faster access to cash when you need to pay milestones, HELOC loan requirements and timing?
Tax credit arrives after finalization, often 1–2 years into the journey
Use the tax credit and employer benefits to pay down loans - not to pay initially
4. Build a contingency buffer. Know in advance what happens if your primary funding source falls through. Failed matches, failed transfers, and contested proceedings are real, not just worst-case scenarios.
5. Use multiple funding sources. Relying on a single source, especially a competitive grant is high-risk. Grants are excellent supplemental funding but unpredictable timing.
6. Know Your Money Speed. Private domestic adoption has a timing realty. When a match happens, agencies typically require funds to go into escrow within 24-72 hours. You need to know before you’re active in a match pool exactly how fast you can move money.
Map your liquidity tiers now:
Within 24 hours
Checking or savings accounts
An already-approved and unfrozen line of credit
Credit card (high interest, but it moves fast)
Within 1–2 weeks
Personal loan approval and disbursement
HELOC draw (if the account is already open and funded — opening a new HELOC takes 2–6 weeks)
Liquidating publicly traded stocks or mutual funds (settlement is typically T+1 to T+2)
30+ days
Grant disbursements (most process on quarterly or biannual cycles)
Retirement account withdrawals (possible penalties; takes time to process)
Opening a new HELOC or home equity loan
Real estate or other illiquid assets
The practical question to answer before you’re in matching: "If I get a call tomorrow, can I move $X into escrow by Thursday?" If the answer is no, that's the first gap to close.
This doesn't apply the same way to surrogacy, where costs are typically staged across a longer, more predictable timeline. But the principle holds. Know when each funding source becomes available, not just whether it exists.
Part Eight: Finances is One Piece of How to Determine Which is Right For You
This guide covers the financial side of adoption and surrogacy in detail, which matters deeply. But Famally exists because we believe families built through these paths deserve the whole picture, not just the parts that are easy to say.
The children at the center of these decisions did not choose this. A child born through surrogacy did not choose to be gestated by someone other than their parent. A child placed for adoption did not choose to leave their birth family. Those are real experiences with real psychological weight, and they belong to the child, not the parents. Your desire to build a family is valid and real. It does not cancel out what the child will carry.
That is not an argument against adoption or surrogacy. It is an argument for going in with your eyes fully open.
Adopted people, donor-conceived people, and people born through surrogacy are increasingly clear that they want and deserved honesty about their origins from the beginning, not a story softened for their parents comfort. The families that do best are the ones who built openness into their parenting from day one, who didn't treat the child's story as something to manage or protect them from.
Before you decide on adoption or surrogacy, make sure that you are choosing this path because you geninuenly want to parent a child who came to you this way, not because your arms are empty and you want a baby from any path available. Have you thought about how you’ll talk to your child about their origins, when the questions get harder? Have you read first-person accounts from adult adoptees and people born through surrogacy, not just positive ones?
Please do not choose a path based on cost. If you're leaning toward one path over the other primarily because it's cheaper, that is a signal to pause. These are lifetime decisions for your child's lifetime, not just yours. The financial investment is significant. The emotional and relational investment is larger.
Famally is a resource for non-birthing parents, and we are genuinely glad you're here. We also believe that serving families well means telling the truth, including this part. The children who come home through adoption, surrogacy, and foster care deserve parents who went in knowing what they were saying yes to for the full arc of a human life.
We've pulled all of this into one organized, downloadable planning guide including a cost estimator by path type, a grant checklist, and a planning timeline you can use as you go. Enter your email to get it sent directly to you.